The Joy of Riding. Found.

Just checked to see that the preceding post was actually the last post written.  Have been riding consistently but not writing it up.  Not that there's anything to write about.  We've been riding the hills, discovering new tracks or making old tracks rideable again ( have the bruises to prove it, earned by breaking through lantana bushes). 

Looked through the collection of Parelli CDs mailed to me and realized I haven't looked at about 5 of them.  Yes, the gloss has gone off the Parelli method.  Nothing wrong with it but lack of motivation from me.  I'm riding again and enjoying the riding,  Part of that enjoyment is because we're not training.  I became so focussed on improving whatever we were working on whether it was getting fit for endurance, being on the bit for dressage  or finally the Parelli method that it wasn't fun anymore.

Having a goal is nice but when I rode as a kid it was the joy of riding that satisfied.  Just being on a horse's back, being carried by these magnificent creatures was enough.  Somehow I lost that with adulthood.  I shed tears of frustration,  fought back anger and beat myself up all for the sake of training, all for the *love* of horses. 

Something is dreadfully wrong with that picture.  Now I ride and if Balthazar gets a bit above himself, I bail.  I have a few tools in my toolbox and 40 years of riding to help overcome problems but not being in training has solved the problems.  In fact there is no problem.  I'm laughing again when I ride.  Singing too (Balthazar doesn't mind).  It's fun again and it hasn't been fun for years.  I look forward to riding rather than dreading yet another confrontation and/or failed session. 

That's important enough to repeat.  I look forward to riding again.  It's not a slog, it's not a lesson, it's not something to be got through, it's not a clash of personalities, it's not an illustration of how much a failure I am as a human being, much less a horseperson.  I don't care if he tracks straight or not.  I don't care if he's bent like a banana to the left (hollow left, stiff right), I don't care if he doesn't always pick up the correct  lead.  I do care that he stops and goes when asked.  I do care that he doesn't run away when he sees me coming with the halter.  I do care that he has the fitness to roam these hills comfortably.  I do care that he, despite being a thoroughbred, has enough nimbleness of foot to be surefooted on rocky trails.  I do care that stopping while he has a pick and I soak up Nature is a common and happy occurrence. 

I'm grateful to Parelli (and Peter) for getting me riding again but I don't think I'll renew my membership.  I have no desire to get to level 4 (or level 2 for that matter!), to ride bareback and bridleless or to get Balthazar working at liberty.  It'd be nice to have that result but I'd rather just hang out with him.  And isn't that what the love of horses is all about?  I lost it and now I've found it again.