Balthazar and I, just in the past few days, have developed a communication and a relationship unlike anything we've had before. For the first time since I've owned him I count him friend - and friendly. It is raining this evening so we only played around in the stall and in the yards. Initially thought I'd only go down and share territory. He'd finished dinner and was standing with his head out the opposite door (the stall has two doors at catty corner ends). I went and stood in the opposite corner, relaxed and leaning on the rail. I just looked at him. Not hard, just softly. There is much to admire with just looking anyway. After a few moments he turned towards me, licked the feed bin on the way and stood in front of me with his head at my knees. I scratched around his ears where he likes it. He smelled down my legs paying particular attention to the gum boots. When he raised his head I continued scratching. He stepped in too close at one point and I just asked, with my hand stroking the air in front of his nose, to step back. He did.

I left the stall and invited him to come with me. He did. Without knowing how I got a lot of two eye contact. Noticed when I walked toward him he'd swing his head away so I'd stop and back away a step or just make my body smaller and he'd swing his head toward me again. It was low key, slow and relaxed, and very illuminating. He did a little companion walking, a little quiet bonding, one horse to person, and a bit of two eye contact.

I've finally found a way to be buddies with Balthazar that doesn't involve food (which puts the emphasis on treats rather than on true communication between horse and woman) nor does it involve Dominance as touted in much of the NH literature.

It is true that there usually is a dominant horse and a leader horse in a herd. At least in my small group of three, Ill-tempered, quick to kick, Dakota is the dominant horse but Pagan is the leader. Funny how I never saw that before reading Farah DeJohnette's blog (http://www.fdhorsemanship.com/)and looking into Carolyn Resnick's work (www.carolynresnickblog.com).

O

.