Sharing Territory

Took my little 3 legged collapsible stool into the Geldings Paddock to Share Territory with the boys. Balthazar came over to check me out and walked toward me another time before veering off (in a leisurely fashion) but it was valuable nevertheless. As they worked their way around the paddock I'd pick up my stool and relocate. Looking at the surrounding hills from a different vantage point was lovely. I've walked in that paddock many times but haven't just stopped and looked around, except in a cursory way. Spending time with nothing to do but look was calming - just as I was supposed to be during this Sharing of Territory.

After feeding up I let Balthazar out of the stall and he immediately joined the others. I did a little hand waving to move him away which he ignored. To get my energy up and get some movement I jumped in the air and clapped my hands. He moved and then did a bit of a companion walk with me. But it was after I stopped *trying* so hard that we had the best interaction. He came over and put his head in my chest again for a head rub.

Let the others out and I led them to the front paddock. Pagan was the best Companion Walker. He followed me with only one small deviation to the mugga ironbark. He even walked across the electrical poles to stay with me. Balthazar waited in the yards for a while and then joined us. Tried to encourage a trot from the horses by trotting and *cantering* myself but didn't get a response. When the others tired of the game, Balthazar was still *with* me. It was lovely, just lovely, to hug and kiss them all goodnight in the fading light. Felt like a child again when it was enough to be around horses without expectations.

Have to say the difference between working with Balthazar with c/t and the Waterhole Ritual - or whatever this is that I'm trying to do, bonding with Balthazar on his terms (mostly) is as different as salt and pepper. We're both relaxed. We're communiating. It is more a conversation than a declamatory monologue by me. He's happier and so am I.

Peter has sent me a link to a video clip of a horse before and after Parelli (a Parelli makeover I think it was called). I do think the Parelli method works, that it is effective and has helped thousands of horses and their owners to find a common ground. But still, there is something about it that is not quite the fit, for me, that I'm looking for. I remember the Faulkner clinics I attended. There were times, quite a few times, when Balthazar or I were stressed. Me being stressed is one thing, usually brought about because I don't know what I'm doing and get nervous about failing in front of evryone, but having Balthazar nervous is another kettle of fish altogether. How can anyone learn when they are stressed or frightened or both? I think going back to basic communication *on his terms* is something that will form a bond that we've never had before. I see signs of it already.

I know I am the chameleon of change in some ways, although I certainly gave c/t a long and best shot before giving it up. It's just that I'm on a quest to find the most successful and, for want of a better word, spiritual path upon which Balthazar and I may walk together. Using force, which I am wont to do because of my short attention span and impatience (something I am trying to counteract with yoga and meditation), is the easy way, the way I often take. I don't want that anymore. I want to be a better person and a better horseowner.